As the day goes by many people visit me.
There are many young and many old.
Some are newcomers and some are the regulars.
Many adore me and many are scared.
Most of them, left me, but some of them stay.
But that did no good.
Because now they have closed me down.
My wheel has been rusted and my gears have been busted.
My popularity is gone as the new ones come in.
Some are fast and some are slow.
Some are even a nasty freak show.
But this is the worst.
The one that took me away.
The rollercoaster put me into a lot of pain.
I think you did good job developing this journal entry.It was very creative. I like how you use the voice of the Ferris Wheel.
ReplyDeleteNice one, but I would have used a tad more detail.
ReplyDeleteI love this! The voice of the Ferris wheel and the poem, its all great. This should be your own personal style of writing! Again, I love it!
ReplyDeleteIt's interesting how you made the actual Ferris wheel speak instead of yourself or someone else telling the story. It's very creative and unique! I really like this, and the rhyming and reason for the wheel to be shut down was excellent.
ReplyDeleteI love the variety of your style of writing; you can always make something work. I say this a lot, but I mean it: you should continue any one of your stories. You excel in all sorts of writing, but I love it when you write fiction. If you did add more, I would read it.
ReplyDeleteI really love how you wrote this in the Ferris wheel's point of view. Your idea of the Ferris wheel getting taken away was really creative.
ReplyDeleteI thought it was cool how you told the story from the point of view as the ferris wheel. It added a sort of feel to it.
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